While some family relationships can bring support, joy, and many other wonderful benefits into our lives, these relationships can also bring stress, pain and conflict. Because it's more difficult to let go of conflicted relationships with family than it would be if these relationships were friendships, unresolved conflicts with family members can be particularly painful. They are the conflicts that bring us the most pain, make us suffer, and distress us. We have certain expectations of trust and closeness toward family members, and it can be more than merely disappointing to realize that this may not be possible with all family members.
Once a conflict has gone on a while, even if both people move on and remain polite, the feelings of pain and mistrust are usually lingering under the surface, and are quiet difficult to resolve: bringing up old hurts in an effort to resolve them can often backfire badly, as the other person may feel attacked; avoiding the issue altogether but holding onto resentment can poison feelings in the present.Put yourself in the shoes of the other. For a moment, suspend your own judgment and do your best to see the situation you’re confronting from the perspective of the other.
It is important to recognize that not all family relationships are healthy and sometimes boundaries for self protection must be put in place. We all wish for and desire happy bonded families but the truth is many people do not have and never had this.
It's a good idea to try to forgive the other person and let it go. Forgiving doesn't mean opening yourself up to feel wronged again; it only means that you let go of your feelings of resentment and built up anger. You can be careful in what you expect from this person in the future without actively harboring resentment, and you'll be the one to benefit the most. Call upon the Holy Spirit to heal all troubled relationships.Whenever the Holy Spirit is invited into our lives like this He brings peace to all involved.Remember change begins with you…from deep within you. In this sense, love and peace can always be found.
O Holy Spirit, You are the Comforter. Help me to let go of the losses in my life. Heal my heart. And help me to face my errors and to feel genuine sorrow for any damage ~ both intentional and unintentional ~ that I have inflicted on others.Please Heal this relationship between myself and ---------------------.
Comfort me as I mourn my need for forgiveness, and give me Your spirit of rejoicing over this new growth in me. Amen